Welcome to the Swipe Right Effect podcast, where we explore the power of self-acceptance and getting unstuck. Hosted by CK Collins, also known as Kelly, this podcast delves into personal stories of overcoming challenges and gaining wisdom and guidance. If you're feeling stuck and waiting for a fresh start in life, you've come to the right place. In this blog post, we'll take a closer look at an episode featuring resilience survivor Kirsten Johansen, who shares her journey of self-acceptance and healing.
Discovering Unconditional Positive Regard:
Kirsten Johansen is a survivor of various life challenges, including addiction, disordered eating, trauma, and significant life changes. She is a coach, writer, and host of her show, GTO Freedom, where she helps others achieve unconditional self-acceptance. Kirsten emphasizes the importance of developing unconditional positive regard for oneself to identify and address the thought, feeling, and behavior patterns that cause suffering and hinder personal growth.
The Influence of Tango and Giraffes:
During the podcast episode, Kirsten explains how she chose the name "Giraffe Tango Octopus" for her company. After hitting rock bottom, Kirsten embarked on a journey of self-discovery. Shedding the layers of her past, she realized the need for self-acceptance and self-expression. Kirsten identified with the solitary nature of octopuses and their ability to adapt. She also described herself as a friendly giraffe, gentle yet lanky. The concept of tango resonated with her, as it symbolizes the importance of integration, connection, and harmony within oneself.
The podcast episode delves into the topic of resentment, highlighting its detrimental effects on joy, freedom, and happiness. Kirsten and Kelly discuss the toxic nature of resentment and the need to prevent new resentments from forming while releasing existing ones. Through their conversation, listeners gain insights and strategies to address and overcome resentment, allowing for personal growth and a more fulfilling life.
The Turning Point:
Kirsten shares her personal turning point during her rock bottom period, which involved a relationship ending and the loss of various aspects of her life. She sought help from a therapist who recommended a book that profoundly impacted her. Reading the book, Kirsten realized the source of her pain and suffering was rooted in self-hate and conditioning. This revelation sparked a transformative shift in her perspective, leading her to embrace self-acceptance and reject the lies she had believed about herself.
The speakers emphasize the importance of understanding that resentments belong to the individual experiencing them and are not about the other person or situation involved. They discuss how resentments can cause suffering and become sticky, leading to harmful cycles and anesthesia behaviors.
To address resentment, they suggest several tools and approaches. Firstly, they stress the need to recognize and acknowledge resentment as a re-experiencing of past wounds. Taking ownership of the resentment is essential and understanding that no external factors can clear it, only the individual can do so.
To break the narrative that fuels resentment, they recommend disrupting the thought patterns by using various techniques. These include saying nonsense words, dancing, or using mantras that remind individuals to let go and not attach themselves to the suffering. By disrupting the narrative, it becomes easier to allow emotions to flow through and prevent getting caught up in harmful cycles.
Another tool they mention is the use of compassionate honesty. This involves stating the facts without adding charged language or spinning them into a narrative. By practicing compassionate honesty, individuals can identify the true impact of a situation and gain insights into the source of their suffering. Additionally, they emphasize the importance of taking personal responsibility by examining one's own part in the situation.
The speakers also discuss the significance of self-love and self-acceptance, especially during challenging times when external support may be limited. They highlight the power of recognizing one's own worthiness and sufficiency, reinforcing the idea that there is nothing wrong with oneself.
Overall, the conversation emphasizes the need to understand and release resentments, disrupt negative thought patterns, practice compassionate honesty, and cultivate self-love to break free from the grip of resentment and find healing and peace. By employing these tools, individuals can navigate challenging situations more effectively and create a healthier, more fulfilling life.